Her Light Still Shines...

I did not know her personally.  She was a trainer at the gym where I work out when I heard the news that leukemia had come. Occasionally there would be photos posted and I recall an event or two to help the family. When I’d see pictures of her, I would offer prayers for healing for this mom of three little girls. 

She’s gone now. I saw Facebook posts yesterday which led to her blog where her gracious, loving, articulate husband was brave enough to post her passing, right after she left us. I see now that many, many people (a lot I know) were following her story as it unfolded. She wrote words of encouragement and strength even as hers faded.  The fact that I am writing about her death doesn’t seem ‘fair’ since I didn’t know her or follow her journey in life. But then again, she was a light and like a star whose light continues on for what seems to be forever, I am only now being touched by it… and thus will you be too.

We weep when a mom of little girls leaves them. No matter how old we are, if we are parents, we feel that loss ourselves and it is unspeakably difficult. Our tears do the speaking for us. So many people have followed her journey, not only because they loved her, but also because it represents our common human journey and an end that we must all eventually face. I took the time to read a little of her blog. I see that she faced it with honesty, hope and graciousness. Her bedrock was faith in Christ. This Christ who conquered death… the death we will face. Likely you’ve heard that before “Christ conquered death.” If you are familiar with the Christian faith, you know what that means. If you are unfamiliar with Christianity, the phrase is odd, but still matters because well, we all will die. And some, like this young mom, earlier than she was ‘supposed to.’

Before I continue, I offer a speedy theological primer from one who believes that God created the universe, sustains it now and is Good:  God made everything and decided it was good. When He created humans, we were given a ‘mind of our own’ (don’t we know it!!). Using this mind we made choices that dissed God and therefore paid the consequences, which is where death came in. It wasn’t supposed to be this way! Right away this good, grieving God came up with a plan that both honored our ‘minds of our own’ and gave us a way to still be in relationship with him, forever. That’s where Jesus comes in. He was in the story way back before creation, but one quick blog post isn’t the place to wax on about all of this. Eventually, Jesus showed up in human form, destined to die like any of us. He did, but that wasn’t the end of the story. He actually was bodily resurrected and then headed up to heaven in what’s called “the Ascension”… and even now, He is sitting with God the Father and able to hang out with us and love us and comfort us too in the form of the Holy Spirit. So, as I was saying, “Christ conquered death.”

This is where theology intersects with life, is it not?  When an athletic, beautiful wife and mother must painfully endure her life being taken away. Reading bits of her story I saw that while the journey was hers, she was not alone, AT ALL.  Within sixteen hours of her death, 170+ people have responded with words of sorrow and comfort after her husband told of her passing. That doesn’t include the countless prayers and personal sorrow felt by the likes of strangers like me. She was definitely a light in the midst of darkness.  People have noted what a hands-on daddy the girls have. I have no doubt that family and women in the community will continue to act as surrogate moms… painting finger nails and making dolls dresses which will eventually morph into shopping for prom formals. The Body of Christ (what Christians are called since the only ‘hands’ of Jesus here now are those of his followers) will be there, making meals, cleaning carpets, picking up the girls from school and soccer practice, taking them to birthday parties, folding laundry, helping with homework, coming around Dad and his daughters as they grieve.

Was God was able to swoop down and work a miracle of healing in her? Sure. He still does healing miracles all the time, but these are mostly seen in the non-western world where people are more open to His big acts. We in the west are fond of rationally trying to box in the God of the Universe instead of being open to the Mystery that He is. Her healing didn’t come on earth, though in heaven she is able to dance again. In the Bible, Hebrews 11:1 says:  “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” This is followed by a huge list of humans who lived by faith and what that meant…

Allie lived by faith. She longed for healing so she could continue being a mom and wife and friend and athlete and… But when healing here and now didn’t come, she also died by faith. I hope that no one tells her girls nasty little phrases meant to ‘comfort’ like: “Jesus needed your mommy in heaven…” which is a crock. Jesus doesn’t need us in heaven. Her girls need her here and at their sorrowful cores, they know that full well. The miracle will be that Jesus is with them in their grief, tears, anger and questions. The miracle is that his closeness and unsearchable love for us all is near. He will be with them. He will also come in the form of others who give to this family what they need and more… That is the miracle in a loss so big that even strangers grieve.

http://www.livestrongarmstrong.com/in-memory/

Sorrow

Isaiah the prophet says this of the coming Christ: "Surely our griefs He Himself bore, And our sorrows He carried". There is MUCH, much more than that in the amazing prophetic message of the suffering servant, but those are the words that come to me this evening.

My mother-in-law died this morning, and thus, it is a day of great sorrow. We knew this day was coming after the past 18 months of her life was spent in hospitals... frequently hoping she just might make it home, but then encountering set back after set back... today, she did make it home.

I think this new home will be completely unfamiliar, yet at the same time, a warm, inviting and fragrantly familiar place. She will once again dine and dance and laugh with joy. She was a gentle woman and after this incredibly long battle of hanging onto life, I am happy she can completely rest and feel relief and joy as never before.

Meanwhile, we will feel sorrow. We will mourn and grieve and remember. Isaiah reminds us, however, that Jesus bears that sorrow and grief and was the Only One to once and for all eliminate it completely on the cross. Of course the fullness of that elimination isn't ours to hold yet, this side of the veil. But, oh, it IS for those on the other side. Sorrow for them has passed. They know what we do not. Most of all, they know Jesus himself... in a wonderful, timeless way not bound by earthly perimeters.

Gratefully, our family has had many who have journeyed and prayed with us these many months. The past few days, they have willingly received a few cyber updates I have passed on. Words of encouragement and prayers matter. What follows is merely part of today's update with the news that she is gone.

Dear Ones,

As I was thinking about how to title this note, I was thinking about the concept of “commencement”. Dave’s Mom’s life on earth ended this morning around 10:15 am, but it is for her a commencement of New Life. I had a strong sense that she was welcomed into the arms of Jesus like a child who is so greatly loved that she has not a care in the world. Indeed, that is the case for her this afternoon. All fear, all pain, all unknowns are gone. Dave, his dad and his aunts were able to be at her bedside at the very end, and the other brothers were not far behind.

She was taken off of life support systems yesterday morning. That decision was very difficult, but they all had agreement about the timing. She rested peacefully from that time on with members of the family at her side round the clock. As you would expect, they are all physically and emotionally exhausted. Dave is grateful for your prayer support and said that he is more physically tired than anything. Once his mom died, he was able to pray with the family as they ushered her into the Kingdom of Life.

Finally I am adding a scripture from I Corinthians 15. It’s paraphrased in the Message which always seems to provide a fresh look at God’s word. May we all be encouraged as our futures are indeed in the loving hands of God. What follows reflects on the mystery of the Resurrection.

1 Corinthians 15:50-58 (The Message)

⁵⁰I need to emphasize, friends, that our natural, earthy lives don't in themselves lead us by their very nature into the kingdom of God. Their very "nature" is to die, so how could they "naturally" end up in the Life kingdom? ^51-57But let me tell you something wonderful, a mystery I'll probably never fully understand. We're not all going to die—but we are all going to be changed. You hear a blast to end all blasts from a trumpet, and in the time that you look up and blink your eyes—it's over. On signal from that trumpet from heaven, the dead will be up and out of their graves, beyond the reach of death, never to die again. At the same moment and in the same way, we'll all be changed. In the resurrection scheme of things, this has to happen: everything perishable taken off the shelves and replaced by the imperishable, this mortal replaced by the immortal. Then the saying will come true:

Death swallowed by triumphant Life!
Who got the last word, oh, Death?
Oh, Death, who's afraid of you now?
It was sin that made death so frightening and law-code guilt that gave sin its leverage, its destructive power. But now in a single victorious stroke of Life, all three—sin, guilt, death—are gone, the gift of our Master, Jesus Christ. Thank God! ⁵⁸With all this going for us, my dear, dear friends, stand your ground. And don't hold back. Throw yourselves into the work of the Master, confident that nothing you do for him is a waste of time or effort.

Thank you so much for receiving these messages from me, on Dave’s behalf.

The love, grace and shalom of Christ be upon you,

Andi